♥'s for Hobo's

I know we all have weird schedules. Some of us get up early (for you: 4-5am?). Some of us go to bed late (me.. sometimes 2-3am) Sometimes we have weird days off (you -???. Me - everyday until I get a job). Sometimes, we have a precise schedule (Shawn - Mon - Fri working 8:30-5:30 but going to bed at 10pm waking at 5pm).

I know we don’t know each other well. In fact, our only encounters of one another were when you would stomp your way up the stairs in front of my door, and my door just happened to be open. That’s not often. We didn’t talk until your mom actually stopped me while I had a HUGE bag (read that as OMG SUPER FREAKING HEAVY PLASTIC BAG FULL OF GROCERIES) in my arms as I was leaving my car to empty it inside. She kept talking and talking and talking to me about little details of my life that I wasn’t really ready to offer. Then you came down. I saw how your lower half of your body was much more… rotund than your top. That’s ok! I of all people understand how different people are when it comes to body types and sizes.

But what you don’t understand, as most larger people don’t, is that you WALK REALLY HARD. My ceiling creaks when you walk. It’s as if it’s calling out a loud and whiney prayer that it won’t break when you pass from the kitchen to the bathroom.

What you don’t understand is that when you bang, what I can only assume is your cat liter box, loudy in the bathroom at 11pm, I can hear that. I can hear when your barreling down the hallways vaccuming the bits and pieces (do you not own a broom?) 30 minutes later. I can hear when you’re walking back and forth in your bedroom moving things at midnight when I am sitting in bed next to Shawn while he’s sleeping (like a mummy, btw, with his hands clasped at his chest. It’s pretty darn cute) watching “How I met your mother.” And it went on until about 2am. WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!

And now, at 5pm, I hear you doing something. I don’t know what exactly, but the floor is creaking above me back and forth, and there is a bunch of tumbling.

Listen, I don’t blame you for all of this. Aprtments are faultly and sometimes have bad insulation, even more so in the area’s between each floor. But come on. You don’t have to march through each room. I am sure I am not super quiet when I am shouting on my show. I’m sure sometimes I drop things and you can hear it, too. But this is simply a problem of you not really… being one of those people who “wear” their weight well. There are some who do, and some who don’t. I wish you would just “not wear it well” when everyone is asleep.